How to Stop Negative Thoughts – 3 Reasons to Not Hold A Grudge

How to Stop Negative Thoughts how to be more positive

How to Stop Negative Thoughts

How to Stop Negative Thoughts and Grudges

We’ve all been there. We’ve all felt that someone has wronged us, slandered us, tricked us, lied to us, cheated us and so on. We’ve all held grudges. We’ve all rationalized it. We’ve all held on to it.

Here is how to stop negative thoughts and grudges:

1. It takes more energy than letting it go. In order to hold a grudge you have to constantly run a negative experience through your mind over and over again, especially when and if you see the person – what they’ve done, what they should of done and how they did it. When you see them, you even replay it more vividly than before! THAT’S A LOT OF WORK! What are you getting out of it? Do you think you’re teaching them a lesson? Life is too short to waste any energy on holding a grudge. Live and let go!

2. It sabotages your own happiness. Odds are if you hold one grudge, you are probably holding a whole bunch of grudges towards various people and events. How can you be happy, excited and passionate if your mind is full of reasons to hate, dislike and disconnect? Put your happiness at the forefront of your mind. You’re worth it!

3. It makes you and your life smaller. Holding grudges limits who you will interact with, where you will go and what you will try. When we don’t grow we become smaller. We shrink. Don’t allow your grudges to limit you, sabotage you, or take up your two most valuable resources – your mind and your time!

“Holding a grudge is like drinking poison is waiting for the other person to die.” -Buddha

“Holding a grudge is like letting someone live rent free in your head!” -Unknown

Also check these positive thinking exercises!

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How to Stop Negative Thoughts

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43 responses to “How to Stop Negative Thoughts – 3 Reasons to Not Hold A Grudge

  1. I think that holding a grudge is something one stops doing once they grasp the true essence of life. When someone upsets you in any way, you should talk about it and find peace. Whether you withdraw yourself from that relationship thereafter is your call just as long as you do that in peace. Ask yourself if it’s worth it holding a grudge- unnecessary bad energy, negative feelings and so much more.

  2. What do I do if I’m holding a grudge against a family member, and every day they give me another reason to be angry at them. The deal is this, I don’t want to say anything to them because I love them, I really do and I don’t want to hurt their feelings. But by keeping my feelings in I’m just making it worse. It is really hard for me to let it go and it bugs me to death… 😦

  3. Good blog! I think there is a proverb something to the effect of (and I paraphrasing here) “If I hold a grudge/anger/resentment, I must dig two graves: one for the other person and one for me.”

  4. I watched a Lisa Nichols video that had a little in it about this and it was wonderful. I forgive and turn loose easily, but I do have problems sometimes with people who don’t let go of me and I would love to have you address that. When you are trying to move on in your life and have clawing little hands all over your back trying to keep you in a situation that you are trying to move away from. Some people and organizations with huge rolodexes have the capacity to continually try to create unhealthy situations in peoples lives.

  5. Reblogged this on Jake Kuyser and commented:
    I’m re-blogging this post from Everyday Power. I’ve held far too many grudges in life. It’s probably better just to let go of them. Forgive and forget!

  6. If I fell off a horse and broke my leg, I wouldn’t take it out of the cast once a week and re-break it! So why is it so easy to keep an emotional wound open? Healing can be difficult, but it starts with the DESIRE to heal. Human nature leads us to hold on to those grudges and seek some form of “justice”. It’s difficult to realize that our “justice” must be tempered by mercy (no “”, just real, genuine mercy) and that letting go is the most merciful thing we can do for both parties.

  7. The greatest role model for not holding a grudge is the biblical Joseph.
    After all his brothers did to him, he still harbored no resentment.
    “Anger begins with madness and ends with regret.” – Ben Hamelech V’Hanazir

  8. Holding a grudge, holding onto pain, simply keeps me from making my experience in life the best it can be. Healing and moving forward, tiny steps at a time! =)

  9. Wholeheartedly agree! You forgot to mention the adverse health benefits of holding a grudge. Actually it was Jesus, who had the idea about forgiveness since the world began.

  10. Truth, clearly expressed- this is lovely to see; so many people suffer because they can’t let go…and that, is something that hurts them most- at least most of the time. 🙂 Agree. I might reference this, at some point..

  11. By not holding grudges, does it mean one must forgive and forget? It confuses me at times. I do forgive those who have gravely wronged me, but I dismiss them from my life entirely. I have burnt bridges and never looked back. When I see the person, I don’t feel hatred, just indifference. Am I making sense?

    • You don’t have to forget, but forgiving will allow you to move on. The more bridges we burn the more we understand how important forgiveness is. I’ve learned that plenty!!! 😉

    • Yep, you’re making sense. I’m attempting not to sound presumptious -I’ve hardly lived my own life so far, not many- but…I don’t think you’d have to forget necessarily, to forgive.
      But it’s easier that way. 🙂

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